Daughter of Deceit
by bananagirl.97
Summary: Holly White has no idea who she is. She's never really been allowed to know. Her father's life has been shrouded in mystery, forever kept from her. She needs to know. One-shot.


She knows next to nothing about her father. Her mother only mentions him on the days where she's had a bit too much to drink, and her brother soon puts a stop to that.

She's not allowed to know. It's too raw, too painful… too much. Or that's the excuses they use at least.

Yet Uncle Hank is mentioned almost daily. Flynn practically worships him, forever speculating how things would be if he hadn't died. He's even got a research job at the DEA in homage to him. "We need to keep his memory alive." That's what Flynn keeps repeatedly saying, but nobody wants to keep Walter White alive.

There are a few pictures of him around their house, but they lack in number. Mom likes to keep their wedding photo besides her bed, much to Flynn's chagrin. On the days of which nobody is home, she sneaks into that room and looks at that picture, trying to decide which of her parents she takes after more.

She hears the whispers on the streets, whenever she's at school. Other kids don't say anything but parents do, and teachers do. _That's Heisenberg's daughter. Heisenberg._ The name means nothing to her, she doesn't understand the reason why people use that instead of Walter White, but that's because her family don't want her to know.

She's an intelligent girl, and shows a talent for science. She comes home with her report card and tells her mother that she wants to pursue chemistry. Her mom's face blanches and that night she passes out from over-consumption of alcohol. She is sent to stay with Aunt Marie for a few days.

She eventually gets to the age where she can no longer bear to not know anymore; and she knows that asking her family is not- cannot be- an option. She instead decides to do the research herself. She googles Heisenberg, and she heads to the library to read newspaper clippings. She learns, so so much more than she could have expected. Her brother's hostility begins to make sense. The lies, the drug empire, the murder. They were the children of a monster. They were the children of the devil. But the devil feeds off deceit and lies, so surely things would have been so much easier if they had just explained the truth to her. Because for Holly, it became an obsession- discovering who her father was, and what evil deeds he did that made her family shake in fear at the mention of his name. By the time she had found out, she had become so attached to the idea of her father, that she found herself trying to justify his actions, even the worst of the worst. She tried to empathise with him, the man whose product probably destroyed hundreds of lives. She needed to know everything about him.

She found a name. Jesse Pinkman. He was suspected to be her Dad's partner in his Meth Amphetamine Empire. Pinkman no longer lived in Albuquerque, but that wasn't a hinderance for her. She needed more. She needed to be closer to Walter, to Heisenberg. She tells her mom that a friend has offered to take her on holiday with her family, and she jumps on a plane and goes.

Arriving on the doorstep of the address she had found, she took a deep breath and prepared to meet the man. She knocks on the door, determination guiding her hand.

It swings open after a minute, and a man probably in his 40s, with kind yet tortured eyes, and a thick beard, stares at her. "Yo, can I help you?"

"I hope so. My name is Holly White."

At the sound of her name, his whole composure changes. He begins to shake, and water comes to his eyes. "I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry."

"Don't be sorry. Just… Please. Tell me about him. I need to know more."

His voice catches in his throat, and his eyes are pained. "You don't. The less you know the better. Whatever your family has told you is enough."

"They've told me jack shit!" she says, her anger rising. "They only ever talk about how great Uncle Hank was; how he shouldn't have been the one to go."

"Your Uncle Hank, though we had our differences, was a good man."

"But my father?"

"Him, not so much. It's long and complicated, and I don't think it's fair to tell you kid."

"I don't know who I am!" she practically screamed by this point. "You're the only one who can reveal some of that to me. It's the only way I can live my life."

Jesse sighed as he watched the girl. "Come in Holly. This is gonna be a long chat."

She flew home the next day. She hated herself. She hated him. She hated what he had done to his family. At least now she knew. She didn't have to live with the silence blaring in her ears. She knew who she was. She was the daughter of Heisenberg. She was learning what that meant, and in time, she would uncover it fully. For now, she would go home, and she would play the role of Holly White. She would play it so damn good; they would have no idea that she knew anything about their family's past. She was Walter White's daughter, after all.

* * *

 **Not quite sure how happy I am with this, but I'm gonna post it anyway! I wanted to write something about Holly after finishing Breaking Bad a couple of weeks ago, and this is what I ended up blurting out when sat at a computer screen. Just a one-shot. Is it too dark/angsty? Is it okay? Review and let me know- it'd be much appreciated. Thanks readers! Bg.97 xx**


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